Search the crowds at any major event and if you look hard enough you’ll find them, with the pain of loss etched across their faces and with the extreme joy that comes with every victory, bursting out of them. They feel the nerves as much as any competitor and there’s no-one there to coach them through it. They manage it, they’re proud and they’re unwavering in their dedication to their children’s goals.
Their children are not being walked to school anymore. They are adults, with their own homes, their own jobs and lives. Some of these ‘children’ are married, run businesses and they all inspire younger generations of judoka. But a parent is a parent!
Reigning world champion and world number 1 Clarisse Agbegnenou of France smiles, as she always does, ‘I want them to enjoy the country and of course because I don’t see them too much, I get to spend time with them too.’ Here in Japan she has the support from mum, dad and brother.
Clarisse talked about how amazing it is to share unique experiences with her family. Mum travels most. ‘I think it’s amazing for her to be here and it’s her first time in Japan. She will stress today for me.’ She giggles. ‘I think she will enjoy being here much more after I have finished fighting.’
Yesterday I spoke to mum of 22 year old German starlet Pauline Starke, just as her daughter won her first contest, ‘I feel better now. I’m sure I will feel crazy again later, but for now I feel better.’
It is Starke’s first senior world championships, following a bronze medal winning performance at the European Games in Minsk earlier this year. ‘We can’t always travel but it’s the worlds! It’s really the worlds!’ So much visible pride.
Great Britain’s Eric Ham gave a fantastic performance yesterday, in his debut at this level, reaching the fourth round with some gutsy judo. His parents travel a lot, often aided by mum’s career with British Airways. Dad, Geoff, has been on the mat with Eric since the beginning, as his first coach and biggest fan.
Eric is close to his parents, ‘It helps knowing they truly support my dream and enjoy being on my journey. It is also nice to spend time outside of the competitions seeing different places with them. The travel bonus is fantastic for all of us and gives us special memories.’
Teen sensation, now double world champion, Daria Bilodid of the Ukraine is very open about the impact her mum has had on her judo career. Their relationship continues to be both professional and uniquely symbiotic. We have all seen those wonderful, emotional photos from last year’s world championships in Baku, of Daria running off to hug her coach, her mum, as they share the moment.
‘My mum is my coach and she always stays with me. So for me she is the biggest support and motivation to win. It means a lot to me to have my mum always by my side. I feel good and strong when I am with her. For her it is also nice. She knows that she gives me a good energy. It’s real happiness to stay close to your family.’
On day 2 I watched the parents of Uta and Hifumi Abe go through the full range of emotions. They swayed in time to the rhythm of the contests and cheered with the crowd whenever their incredible children exploded into jaw-dropping throws. They sat silent and still feeling Hifumi’s loss so very deeply, only to be catapulted back to overwhelming excitement as their children both stepped on to the podium again.
It’s an honourable journey, to accompany children through an elite sports career. It’s a privilege despite its huge rollercoaster of highs and lows. These parents are special humans who love unconditionally and whose love is felt by anyone near to them. Their commitment is to be admired. Watch out for them. They are everywhere.